Month: December 2015

contested Divorce in Utah

4 Tips For Coping With Utah Divorce

When you decide to get a divorce everything runs through your mind. All of the things you have done right in your marriage seem to turn from once happy and content memories to  becoming distant memories tainted with sadness. Maybe you went to premarital counseling before making your decision to marry and even attempted a few sessions of marital counseling before making your decision to divorce. There will be a mix of emotions. The good the bad and then the counseling. You have legal counsel, mental health counselors, the neighbor across the street who thinks she is the counselor and sometimes random strangers who also think that their opinion is at a premium price and the end all be all. The long and the short of it is that only you know your family and the behavior of your soon to be former spouse. Sometimes the opinion of others whether close or admired from afar need to be tabled until you can really determine if it is best for your individual situation. An American Fork Divorce Attorney can help guide you with some good plans for families like yours. There are many options and your Ogden Divorce Attorney can help you explore those options. Divorce utah right to know

When you get divorced, unlike any other time in your life, you are fighting to be uncommitted and untied from your former relationship. You can literally walk away from a job or a friend but you can’t just pack up and leave your once loved life, home and this is especially true when children are involved. When you are at the beginning of a marriage you can do everything humanly possible to prepare for the future, even premarital counseling.  People change, environments change, jobs change, educations change and normal life happens. Salt lake city divorce

Here are a few tips to help you cope with the feelings of doing all the right things and finding yourself going through a divorce:

  • Get rid of “The Perfect or Easy” Divorce: People can look in on a marriage and think that its perfect and others will try to convince you on how simple it is to resolve the problems in a marriage and others how fast a divorce can be with the right attorney. The fact is that perfect kids, perfect homes, perfect kitchens, nice cars, money, love and fidelity are not always what they seem to be. The same is true with divorce. Even in the most “perfect” of marriages there are stressing factors. Marriage is focused work and sometimes that work is difficult, taxing and out rightly frustrating. The difference is the commitment to the marriage and a continued desire for a joint life with your spouse. When that level of commitment changes and divorce is necessary remember that each divorce, like each marriage and family, is unique and very individual. That one person that you found out of the entire human race to join you will become a difficult thorn in your side for a short period of time until your legal issues and a formalized plan for the second chapter of your joint life together is started and finalized. It might not be the chapter you intended during your premarital counseling but do remember it is important to review, take your time and make sure the plans and documents are long term solutions which are viable for both parties. Divorce lawyer in utah
  • Look Objectively:Sometimes taking the emotions out of an experience can result in a successful decision. A simple exercise of taking the names out of the scenario and looking at it as if it was an absolute stranger could really help you look at the demands objectively and with a little more merit and less emotion. A clean look at things and a commitment to yourself to hold off for 24 hours before agreeing to any major decisions can help alleviate a lot of heartache in the long run. Objectively thinking can save you a lot of time and money when you can avoid having to write and re-write documents many times.
  • Have A Set of Personal Goals:Some of the best distractions to current circumstances are new goals. Something to look forward to. These need to be unrelated to the divorce, your children or changing everything about you. They could be related to health, fitness, talents, hobbies, education or other classes. Start with baby steps and with things that are realistic. Many successful people will use the S.M.A.R.T. method. Specific Measurable Attainable, Realistic and Time bound. Smart goals will result in success and better future goals. So pick up that pen and set a few just for you. Family attorneys in utah
  • Steer Clear of Romanticism:One of the first things that excites and scares people is the idea of dating again. For a lot of people it is a very scary thought to think about dating after many years of being with the same person. For others it is exciting and very tempting. During your divorce a lot of emotions are not realistic or valid. Sometimes you feel empowered with the new found independence. The decision to begin being romantically intertwined in relationships with other may hinder the ability you have to make good logical decisions. Often times it can cause distress in the proceedings for the other spouse resulting in lengthy litigation and costly addendums. Making new friends and joining social groups is a surefire way to re-introduce yourself to living single.  In some cases it can make your divorce more difficult when others become involved in the life and decisions you are still making. Since most relationships out of a new divorce do not result in marriages that last it is wise to not allow the new love interest to interject their wishes or feelings into your divorce. A better approach would be to join activity groups, support groups and do charity work. With time you can begin dating. There is no rush. Take your time and enjoy being on your own for a while before settling back in.  As nice as it is to rediscover who you are and what you are all about in a relationship it is best to proceed with caution. Your American Fork Divorce Lawyer can help you decide if starting relationships is the right move during your divorce. Ask your Ogden Divorce Lawyer during your consultation. Utah divorce lawyer

Divorce is difficult no matter how your marriage was planned, executed or lived. Sometimes the only thing you can do is get through today and plan for tomorrow with the best resources you have. With these simple yet attainable steps you can cope a little better along this bumpy journey.